Signs of A Lonely Man: An Introduction
Before we look at the signs of a lonely man, let’s first try and understand the concept of loneliness itself.
Loneliness generally means a condition or a situation in which a person feels that he doesn’t have anybody for himself. He has absolutely nobody with whom he can spend time, talk, or share his different experiences of life. But for a man, loneliness has a way deeper meaning than just that. Why?
It’s because when we talk of loneliness, we assume that the concerned person doesn’t want to be alone. But the condition of a man is such that he doesn’t want to be alone but works only in that direction. Call it his misunderstanding, mistake, or destiny, a man always experiences loneliness. It’s the masculine fate. When he is alone, he wishes some people cared about him. But when he gets such people, he still feels lonesome while talking or being with them. And even after achieving every tangible possession of the world, this void and emptiness within him keep growing continuously. He feels the loneliest when he is at the peak of his life in terms of material wellness.
The Burning Questions
Why does a man always feel lonely? And Is it normal for a man to feel lonely? Why does he fail to overcome loneliness every single time? What are the various signs of a lonely man? How does loneliness affect a man? Is there a way out for him from his loneliness? If yes, how can he eliminate his loneliness, if not prevent it altogether? These are a few among the many questions related to male loneliness. And we are going to explore and understand them and the answers to these questions in all the possible dimensions today. Here we go!
Trying to understand the signs of a lonely man would be more logical once we have seen the causes of a man’s loneliness. So, let’s begin by looking at what makes a man forlorn.
What Makes A Man Lonely?
Why any man all of a sudden starts to feel desolate in life? There can be many explanations for it. These causes of male loneliness may also be treated as the signs of a lonely man. The first and the most important reason is the man himself.
Loneliness Created By A Man Himself
A man is often the biggest culprit for the loneliness he goes through in his life. He does this with his three basic purposes in life. These motives represent who he is, how he feels, or what he wants to become.
A Strong Feeling of Individuality
We all are born as individuals and separate from each other. What one thinks, may not be acceptable to the other. What one eats, won’t fill the stomach of the other. And what one does, may not be liked by another individual. Everything about an individual is different from another individual. But we as human beings still try to live as a group, embracing each other’s variety, diversity, and differences. But for a man, it’s not an easy job. He has an extreme consciousness of his individuality. This intense emotion makes and keeps him at a distance from others in various ways. His thoughts, physicality, and actions are of paramount importance to him. So important, that he prefers them to people, which is also crystal clear in his mind.
This mental clarity of a man regarding his distinctiveness makes him an outcast. Since he is submerged in his individuality, he is almost lost in it. He is not able to see the personality or existence of other people. Also, he cannot view the possibility of correctness in people’s thoughts, physicality, or actions. And most of the time, he is not even ready to discuss things with people and comes to a conclusion based solely on his ideas, opinions, and likings. This behavior not only keeps him lonely in his mind but also in reality as it drives people away from his life. Hence, a man’s passionate chase, celebration, and glorification of his individuality reveal that the man, in all likelihood, is solitary in life.
A Strong Sense of Competition
If a man has such an acute notion & perception of his individuality, then how does he live in a society? It is because he has a profound sense of competition too. He wants his ideology, physicality, or actions to be better than that of others. For eg., if he wants to buy a car, he would ensure that his choice, his decision, and the way he drives his new car are better than other people in every respect. He wants to be superior to others. And he wants his stature to grow continuously in comparison to others.
Due to this hardcore competitive nature of a man, although he triumphs in becoming better than others, in the process, keeps getting increasingly isolated in life. Success doesn’t make you lonesome if it comes in a way that connects you to people. But if your successful outcomes create an ever-growing gap between you and others, you may succeed materially but would live to remain alone & stranded in life. Hence, upon noticing a man’s intense sense of rivalry, anyone can easily guess that he has gone friendless in life.
A Strong Negative Impact of Success
Success ideally brings more brains, dependability, and goodness into a person and his life. But most of the time, it’s not true for a man. Success generally takes a man in the wrong direction. When a man starts earning a thick salary, gets consistent promotions to higher and higher ranks of leadership, and builds a huge personal empire, he can’t differentiate between wrong and right, anymore. Success imparts and instills over-confidence, ill-will, and greed into him. This makes a man demolish trust, ruin relationships, and destroy the lives of many close ones, acquaintances, and even unknown people. All these blunders further manifest loneliness in his life for which only he is to blame. Hence, a severe adverse impact of success on a man is also one among the many signs of a lonely man.
The second reason for a man’s loneliness is his unfavorable life circumstances.
Loneliness Created By A Man’s Situations
Any man is capable enough of controlling his detrimental traits and turning them into positive ones for his betterment and driving away loneliness. But many times, his state of affairs is such that despite doing all the right things, he is still left all alone. Let’s see what those situations are.
Loneliness Created By A Man’s Bad Luck
A man’s intentions may have been good, he may have worked very hard for something, and he may have done everything right, but still, failures do occur in life. Sometimes, one’s fiascos might be forgiven by the people who truly love them but many times they are not. And when they are not, we lose those crucial people in our lives. It may be our family, friends, or followers. And when they quit, a man is left with nothing but loneliness and despair with no fault of his but purely due to the state his life is in. Although, not a clear-cut one, a man’s bad luck may also be one of the signs of a lonely man.
Loneliness Created By Misunderstandings
Now, we know that bad lucks may be debilitating for a man’s life and may force him to become a loner. But even the good luck of a man may be dampened by misunderstandings with his close few. Many times what we do or don’t do, or what we say or don’t say, creates confusion in the minds of our dear ones. And if these misinterpretations are not sorted out in time, they may affect, ruin, or even end associations, relations, and bonds. For eg., a man overwhelmed by his work or life commitments may sometimes ask his wife to leave him alone. She may misconstrue it completely and may think that the man doesn’t need her anymore in his life, hence making her go away from his life.
In such states, the man should make things clear that he just wanted to spend some time alone to get his focus back. He did not mean to hurt her or want her to pull out of his life forever. If he fails to do so, he may lose a caring life partner forever. This is how misapprehensions many a time make a man deserted in his life. Thus, misconceptions in personal relations may also serve as one of the signs of a lonely man.
Loneliness Created Through Being Surrounded By Bad People
Bad luck or errors happen when a man is dealing with good people. But it may happen that a man only has a circle of bad people around him, who want to exploit him, use him, and leave him as soon as their selfish motives get fulfilled. And the bad company is as good as loneliness or maybe even worse. This virtual loneliness is soon turned into a real one when these bad people abandon him. Although it is a blessing in disguise, to the man at that moment, it would hurt and make him go through a difficult patch of loneliness. Thus, to avoid such unnecessary loneliness, in the future, he should be extremely careful about who he lets into his life.
Thus, being surrounded by bad people may also be seen as one of the signs of a lonely man.
The third reason for loneliness in a man’s life is the social setup he lives in.
Loneliness Created By The Society
Society is equally at fault for the loneliness that a man has to go through. Its customs, traditions, and trends, put undue pressure on a man that forces him to either choose isolation or be imposed with loneliness. Modern society pushes men into loneliness in the following ways.
Expectations To Be Unduly “Strong”
In modern society, right from their childhood, male children are supposed to be ‘machos’ who don’t cry. If they do, they are made fun of or are scolded for doing so. Similarly, the male child is expected to be serious, focused, and disciplined all the time. A hearty laugh feels like a crime to him. When he should be playful and joyful in life, he becomes too serious, sad, depressed, and full of stress & anxiety. The only option that is given to him, is to flow with the social norms, which pushes him towards the brink and beyond into loneliness.
In trying to be ‘strong’, many men turn out to be broken from the inside. This is when they can’t help but choose isolation over “strength”. And even if they don’t, society refuses to accept such broken men and pushes them into the darkness of loneliness.
Undue Pressure of “Responsibility”
A patriarchal setup is thought to be a favorable state for men. It seems like a cakewalk to everyone. It looks like a position of authority. No doubt, it is a position of power and authority. Many men take advantage of the patriarchal setup of society and don’t let women have their share of the critical positions in society. But what about those men who don’t want to rule? Men in modern societies are expected to build themselves, create & manage groups, institutions, and nations, and lead them. What if some men don’t aspire to do that? What if they want to lead a normal life where they can choose their dreams, aspirations, and professions? Such “irresponsible” men are almost boycotted or written off by society to hand these men darkness, under-confidence, shame, and loneliness for life.
Unfair Push Towards “Success”
Modern men are also supposed to succeed in terms of acquiring money, power, and influence. If they refuse to develop these earthly possessions and choose to follow their passion, they are looked down upon. Let alone help or support, they are not even promoted to pursue what they like to do. Society disowns such “failed” men and continues to promote only men who succeed through the lenses of material excellence. It’s how society’s expectation to succeed pushes men into loneliness.
Hence, an unfair society with stiff, strenuous, and demanding expectations may also be added to the list of the signs of a lonely man.
The fourth reason for loneliness in a man’s life is Nature itself.
Loneliness Created By Nature
The way Nature has designed men makes, promotes, and keeps them an outcast. It’s not impossible but very difficult for men to come out of this “designed loneliness” for them. Nature manifests loneliness in men in the following ways.
Men Are Physically Stronger But Spiritually Weaker
Men are designed to see and not feel too much. And due to this, they are capable of conquering the physical world but are not adept at filling their inner vacuum. This is why they are incapable of eliminating the emptiness and loneliness within themselves in a self-sufficient way. This lack of spiritual development within men explains the prevalence and persistence of loneliness inside them. Hence, a spiritually weaker man is also one of the many signs of a lonely man.
Men Are Made To Expand, Flourish, & Conquer
Since, men are aware only of “one-way traffic”, i.e. towards the outer world, they keep moving in that direction uninterruptedly. They don’t like any obstacles in their way. Love, relationships, or commitments, are all roadblocks in their way to progress, expansion, and growth. Thus, they either have the fear of commitment or they give up all these things in their quest for conquest. And their whole journey is full of loneliness for which they can’t be blamed as they are made that way by Nature. Hence, his struggle for worldly success and achievements is also one of the signs of a lonely man.
Men Are Capable Goal-Achievers
Achieving one’s goals is not a bad thing. People set personal and professional short-term, long-term, and life goals all the time and set out to achieve them. But the way men accomplish their goals, there is no way back to fulfillment for them. The more they achieve, the farther they move from their true selves and their loved ones, and the more lonely they get in the process. Hence, when it comes to eliminating loneliness, goal accomplishment becomes a curse for men as their loneliness grows with each higher count of their professional victories. It’s hard to say whether Nature has made them capable goal-achievers or bad loneliness managers. Thus, being a capable goal-achieving man also serves as one of the signs of a lonely man.
Hence, due to the above reasons and their underlying factors & processes, men experience a greater frequency, degree, and intensity of loneliness in their lives.
Now that we know the causes of male loneliness, we can move ahead to find out the signs of a lonely man. But detecting male loneliness is not an easy task. We have to be very careful, alert, and observant to be able to comprehend that a man is going through loneliness. So, what are these signs of a lonely man? Let’s check them out sequentially.
Signs of A Lonely Man
How to know when a man feels lonely? There are many thinkable signs of a lonely man. We have to be extremely alert while we test a man for these loneliness signs. Some of these signs are typical signs of loneliness, while others are evolving indications of his loneliness or specific signs of loneliness that are seen only in males. Let’s look at these signs of a lonely man one by one.
The first sign of a forsaken man is a general silence or quietness in his demeanor.
Signs of A Lonely Man: Silence/Quietness
The first and one of the major signs of a lonely man is silence. Although silence has rich spiritual benefits, it also has a possible negative side. Silence, on its wrong side, indicates that a man is either incapable of opening up or doesn’t want to talk to anyone, or that he doesn’t have anyone to talk to or someone whom he can trust. In all these cases, he is either broken from within, has developed trust issues, or is left all alone by his folks, all of which point in one single direction that is loneliness. Let’s see how a man’s silence becomes a symbol of his loneliness.
Silence Symbolises Discomfort Around People
When a man is silent around a crowd, it shows his under-confidence. It shows that he has nothing to share with the people around him. Similarly, it may be an indication that he is scared of sharing, making mistakes, or being made fun of, when around people which might lead to his insult in public. Also, the silence of a man, when surrounded by people tells that he has the fear of being judged by people. He is afraid that people would label him as something that he won’t be able to bear.
Hence, silence in its many ways, shows that a man is uncomfortable around people which ultimately points to the loneliness in his life. Thus, experiencing discomfort in public may also serve as one of the signs of a lonely man.
Silence Shows The Unwillingness To Open Up To People
The Silence of a man tells that he is not ready to make anyone a part of his life. He thinks or feels to be completely alone in his life. No matter how empty he may appear, he remains adamant that he doesn’t need anybody else. Next, even if he feels the need for other people in his life, he doesn’t want to take the “burden” that entails inviting, trusting, or taking any additional responsibility in his life. And finally, he is not ready to share his life with someone as he wants to remain the most influential or dominant person in his own life. He feels that he is better off alone as it makes him the king of his life.
Hence, silence shows the unwillingness of a man to open up to people which results in the development and continuation of loneliness in his life. Thus, the unwillingness to open up to people also acts as one of the indications of a lonely man.
Silence Indicates A Dearth of People To Engage With
A man may want to connect and engage with people but he can’t do so. It’s because silence may also come in an imposed form for a man due to an absence of people in his life. This absence of people may be due to reasons like the inability to find companions, the habit of scaring, fighting, or repelling people away, or being shunned, rejected, or isolated by people.
Hence, silence also shows a shortage of people in a man’s life which keeps him from connecting, talking, sharing, or engaging with them. All this shortage or absence of people in a man’s life hands him a long and sometimes life-long loneliness. Thus, a dearth of people to engage with may also work as one of the hints of a rejected man.
This is how silence signifies the existence of loneliness in a man’s life. But silence is not the only indication of loneliness for a man. Even if he is quite chirpy, friendly, mingling, and sociable, he may still be going through loneliness in his life. This brings us to the second clue of a lonely man.
The second sign among the clues of an unwanted man is his inability to enjoy life.
Signs of A Lonely Man: Inability To Enjoy Life
One of the most unfortunate proofs of a desolate man is his inability to enjoy life. Life’s basic purpose is to be and stay happy. And no one can be happy until they savvy how to enjoy life. It is no different for a man. When a man is enjoying his life and is happy, he is an asset to himself and others. Everyone wants such men in their lives. Thus, the ability to enjoy and be happy can keep loneliness far from a man’s life. But most men don’t develop the ability to enjoy their lives, which becomes a hint of their lonesome life. Let’s look into how the inability to enjoy life attracts loneliness into a man’s life.
The Inability To Enjoy Life Makes A Man ‘Boring’
When a man cannot enjoy his life, he cannot escape becoming boring. He, either is a lazy man, who doesn’t want to come out of the comfort of his bed all day. Or maybe, he is good only at planning and not the execution of exciting plans to entertain himself. Or probably, even if he executes his adventurous plans, he is not quite ‘there’, when he is carrying them out. In short, he is boring and considers enjoying one’s life useless or meaningless.
Who wants to be with a boring man? Even the man himself won’t make any buddies if he is boring. After all, friends are the symbol of seeing the lighter side of life and enjoying one’s life to its fullest. Hence, the inability of a man to enjoy his life makes him boring, which also functions as one of the evidence of a forsaken man.
The Inability To Enjoy Life Makes A Man ‘Unenthusiastic’
A boring man may try hard and succeed up to an extent in changing his ways. Still, he may not be able to overcome his lack of enthusiasm or his unenthusiastic conduct regarding life. He may still be dragging his feet while moving out with his dear ones to have some fun. Similarly, he may still be unwilling to undergo some thrill and provide an adrenaline rush to himself and his life by taking some small and manageable risks. He may also develop cold feet while trying to create some beautiful memories that he could have cherished for the rest of his life. He has no affinity for decorating his home, going out to recreational sites or restaurants with his friends or family, or going out of the station with them to have a good time, once in a while.
In short, ‘action’ is missing in the life of a forsaken man due to the absence of the spirit to live life on its edge. And without some lively adventures and expeditions, life gets even more dull and stagnant than just being boring. No wonder, such men sooner or later find themselves to be deserted in their lives. Hence, the inability to enjoy his life makes him unenthusiastic & dull which is one of the many signs of a lonely man.
The Inability To Enjoy Life Keeps A Man From ‘Exploring’
When a man cannot figure out how to enjoy his life, exploring new things will not be his wildest possible dream, either.
Exploring involves experimenting with things, people, and places to broaden the horizons of one’s life experiences. But when a man isn’t even ready to check out the basic beauty of nature or life, there is no way he is going for unique and hidden sources of excitement. He would prefer sitting in his cocoon, fearing what might be out there. He would be fearful or hesitant about meeting new people, unaware of the freshness they might bring into his solitary life.
Next, he would not be ready to try out new places which might change his mood, feelings, emotions, and maybe, his entire life. He doesn’t like improvements, changes, or evolving into his better self. He is unimaginative, lacks curiosity even about interesting things, and doesn’t like to experiment with anything in life.
This inability to enjoy his life that keeps him from exploring anything new makes and keeps him solitary all his life. Hence, the inability to enjoy life and lack of the urge to explore within himself is another mark of a lonesome man.
The third sign in the list of the signs of a lonely man is that he is a workaholic.
Signs of A Lonely Man: Being A Workaholic
Being a workaholic is counted among the hidden signs of a lonely man. It’s because a man tries to conceal his loneliness by working too much. Being a workaholic is never good. It creates an imbalance in your life due to which both your health and blood ties suffer. Apart from this, workaholism also signifies loneliness in a man’s life. He works too much to fill the inner void, to keep himself busy and distracted from the loneliness within, and in the hope to substitute his loneliness with his work achievements. But all of this, of course, fails to pull him out of his loneliness. Let’s see how being a workaholic means a man is friendless.
Workaholism is An Attempt To Fill The Inner Void
An unwanted man feels that by working hard and for longer hours, he would be able to bury his loneliness for some time. So, he becomes a workaholic! But no work in the world is capable of obscuring the impression of nothingness, emptiness, and loneliness in a man’s heart. The more he tries to fill it with work, the emptier it keeps getting. It is because, in the process, he keeps getting more and more distant from the things that matter, hence making himself more and more outcast.
Hence, workaholism cannot fill the inner void and is among the prominent ways to find out whether a man is abandoned.
Workaholism is A Way To Keep Himself Busy & Distracted
When a man comes to know that his workaholism cannot fill his inner void, he tries to use it to keep himself busy and distracted. He thinks that by drowning in his work he can hide from his loneliness. And he wins this battle up to some extent but only till the time he is working. When he stops working, his loneliness takes an even bigger form to haunt him in an even scarier way.
Hence, workaholism pushes a man deeper into his loneliness and thus is a nasty intimation of a man’s loneliness.
Workaholism is An Effort To Replace Loneliness With Success
A man knows that his workaholism is increasing his loneliness even further but he feels he has hope. He thinks, that maybe when he achieves great success, recognition, and limelight in society, he may be able to remove his loneliness. But this is his biggest miscalculation. When you draw people towards you only because you are successful, it doesn’t reduce your loneliness. It increases the feeling. It’s because people are with you not because of who you are or because they really want to be with you but only because you are successful. So, now even the presence of people in your life won’t be enough to eliminate or even reduce your loneliness. Your success has created a boundary between you and people that you cannot breach anymore. It means your loneliness has not only deepened but has taken a permanent form.
Hence, Workaholism or professional success cannot replace male loneliness. They only give it an everlasting form which makes workaholism a dangerous proof of a deserted man.
The fourth sign in the inventory of the signs of a lonely man is rigidity or a lack of flexibility in life.
Signs of A Lonely Man: Rigidity
Rigidity is among the more apparent signs of a lonely man. Men are generally rigid in their thinking, decision-making, and approach. They think their way is unquestionably right. They don’t want to discuss, modify, or change it. This rigidity creates, promotes, and cements loneliness in their lives. And hence, a rigid guy signifies his rejection by people. Let’s see how a man’s rigid ways hand him a lonely life.
Rigidity Chooses Inflexibility Over People
When a chap is rigid and adamant regarding what he thinks, feels, and does, he is willing to push people out of his life. In short, he values himself and his originality more than the significant people in his life. He either feels that all he wants in life is his perception, ideas, and opinions or that he can do without people but not without his individuality in life. But he is wrong. After he chooses his rigidity over people by pushing them out of his life, he realizes the latter’s importance. But by then it’s too late. He is lonely, left only with his rigidity & individuality to live the rest of his life with.
Hence, when a lad is excessively rigid, it points towards the prevalence of loneliness in his life because either he is already solitary in life, or he is liable to get abandoned soon.
Rigidity Creates A ‘People vs. Goals’ Tussle
A guy may be rigid but he may not be willing to lose the consequential people in his life. It’s because he loves them and realizes their value in his life. But his goals are equally indispensable for him too and he doesn’t want to compromise on his career, either. But in the end, goals may win this ‘internal war’ within him. The decision to trade away people for his career goals may be enforced upon him by the circumstances. Although loneliness is forced upon him in this case, he had a choice that he didn’t exercise judiciously. He has lost the important people in his life and might not ever get them back.
The inability to make the right decision is also a kind of rigidity. And this rigidity forces a chap to make the wrong decisions. Hence, rigidity makes a man choose goals over people, thus leaving him lonely. This makes rigidity evidence of loneliness in a man’s life.
Rigidity Causes People To Abandon A Man
When a man is rigid, it’s not only him or his circumstances that lead to his loneliness. People don’t like rigidity, and when a man is too rigid to improve or change, they have no option but to let the man be on his own. The people who are closer to the man might wait a little longer but eventually, if nothing changes, the man finds himself isolated and lonely.
Hence, the rigidity of a man may cause people to depart, thus leaving him in solitude. This is another way how rigidity becomes a likely signal of a forlorn man.
The fifth and final demonstration of loneliness in a man’s life is that his greatest satisfaction lies in his success.
Signs of A Lonely Man: Success is The Greatest Satisfaction
The last but probably one of the biggest signs of a lonely man is that success is his greatest life satisfaction.
What makes a man happiest? Generally, a man is happiest when he succeeds in his mundane endeavors. When a man’s greatest satisfaction is victory and not people, it is almost impossible for him not to undergo loneliness. Success cannot give what people bring with them in your life. Success may give you money, power, fame, and all the material possessions and luxuries of the world. But they cannot give you care, affection, love, happiness, and freedom. The desire to succeed makes a man an outcast in the following ways.
Failures Make A Man Sad
When a man desires successful outcomes and nothing less, he is more often than not, sad, depressed, and forsaken. When triumph is nowhere in sight and only debacles are his present “accomplishments”, he doesn’t even consider holding onto anything else. He mistreats people, doesn’t realise their value, and insults them, which drives them out of his life. This creates loneliness in the man’s life.
Hence, failures or the inability to achieve favourable results, make a man sad which eventually makes him desolate. This is the first way how success as the biggest satisfaction for a man, tells whether a man has become lonely in life.
Some Amount of Success Makes A Man Over-Confident
After a lot of hardships and sacrifices, including that of many people precious to him, a man starts succeeding in life. These successes start making him over-confident which in turn makes him rude, insensitive, and inconsiderate of other people’s situations. He thinks he is superior to others and that he has the right to do anything to them. And he behaves badly with them which makes people desert him. This aggravates loneliness in the man’s life.
Hence, little success proves more dangerous for a man than no success at all. This is why successful outcomes, as the biggest satisfaction for a man, act as one of the most vital traits of a lonely man.
A High Material Success Makes A Man Egoistic
When a man is on top of his professional fortunes, he becomes his worst self. He becomes full of himself, selfish, and egoistic. He thinks he is the master of the world and its people. Also, he forgets his days of struggles, the people who helped him when he was down, and the need to be respectful to people for their help, support, and contributions in his life. This creates distance between him and others which makes him identify himself as the loneliest person on the planet.
Hence, success as the greatest satisfaction for a man makes him egoistic and serves as one of the most salient signs of a lonely man.
We have already seen what makes a man lonely and what the signs of a forsaken man are. We can use them to easily spot loneliness in a man’s life.
Now, let’s move on and see what effects loneliness has on a man.
How Loneliness Affects A Man
The only advantage of loneliness to a man is that it gives him tangible wellness, self-sufficiency, and some of the luxuries of the physical world. Apart from this, loneliness causes havoc in a man’s life. It makes him go through everything that a human being is scared to go through, which includes fear, despair, and extreme depression. It breaks a man from the inside and makes him empty and hollow. To get a more comprehensive view of the case of a lonely man, let’s see how loneliness affects a man in different ways.
Loneliness Keeps A Man Devoid of Compassion, Kindness, or Love
Let’s be honest, no one cares about male loneliness. Nobody is aware of how to love a lonely man or what to say to a lonely guy. They have no regard for how a man feels or what they have to go through while helping the world grow materially.
Why no one cares about male loneliness is because lonely men become grumpy, unreasonable, and miscreants in people’s lives. But they just need love to be able to heal themselves of their miserable loneliness. But as soon as the state of affairs gets uncomfortable, people leave them alone to suffer in the darkness of their loneliness. This keeps men devoid of love. They don’t know how to find a way out of their desperate condition. And there is nobody left to help them out, either. Love was the only hope for them but there remains nobody who could provide him with that “luxury”. He has no option left but to use his loneliness to build his temporal triumphs and in the process aggravate his loneliness further. And this lack of love & concern is what develops into the initial signs of a lonely man.
Loneliness Makes A Man Forget How To Connect, Bond, And Gel With People
Initially, it’s not that a lonely man doesn’t want or try to reconnect with people to eliminate his loneliness. But his under-confidence, confusion, and desperation to connect with new people don’t let that happen. And with time, as his loneliness grows, his confidence dips and desperation heightens. This makes it increasingly harder for him to connect with people. And finally, he forgets how to connect with people and stops trying to find people who could help him remove his loneliness. This means a final closure and the end of trying to take a step in the right direction and away from loneliness. This is when the signs of a lonely man start getting cemented in his life.
Loneliness Makes A Man Lost in The World of Hopelessness, Pain, & Dejection
When the doors of love and bonds close on a man forever, he finally enters and accepts the world of despair. He accepts that he will have to be all alone for the rest of his life. That, no one will ever be able to appreciate him or try to stick around with him. He accepts his defeat to loneliness and makes up his mind to live with it for the rest of his life. His only hope left is to build himself up materially, hence, he starts working to gain money, power, and influence, in the physical world. And this, in turn, keeps making him more and more lonely on the inside. This is when the signs of a lonely man can easily be noticed in a man who has been left lonely.
It’s a sad story of how loneliness tears through the lives of many men in our society. But they still contribute to the creation, maintenance, and growth of it. Men may not have contributed enough spiritually to the world, but materially, they have an immense contribution that can’t be overlooked.
The story of male loneliness is not a given thing and thus can change. Men are capable of eliminating or even avoiding loneliness altogether. Many men have shown and continue to show the way by not only coming out of their loneliness but also by transforming themselves completely. This means there is a potential way out of male loneliness.
So, how can a man come out of his loneliness?
How To Overcome Male Loneliness?
What should a lonely man do? Or how to deal with loneliness, as a man?
If a man wants to fend off his loneliness, he has to take that responsibility solely on himself. It’s because depending on people to stick with him makes him dependent on them. And sooner or later, people will leave him if he doesn’t mend his ways for the better. Also, even if these people stand by him, it will worsen his doings as it may give a feeling to the man that he isn’t doing anything wrong.
Secondly, neither society nor nature will change according to the wishes of a man. It is the man who has to take it upon himself to make the change if he is to circumvent loneliness. It’s a difficult task to change your basic nature but it’s not an impossible one. And he doesn’t have to change his complete nature but only fine-tune the worrisome ones from the loneliness point of view. Remember, you don’t do big things by taking big steps, all together at once, you surmount them through a series of small but consistent steps in the right direction. On that note, let’s find out these small steps or how a man can overcome his loneliness.
Ways To Overcome Male Loneliness :
- Maintain your individuality but also make an effort to stay connected and considerate about the feelings & needs of others.
- Remember that man is a part of everything in the world and not a separate individual exclusive of everything around him.
- Practice ‘Balance’ in everything you do in life so that the ‘Universality’ of your existence balances your ‘Individuality’ in your mind.
- Give up the habit of comparisons & competition and adopt the path of continuous improvement that may be slow but is sure and stays steady.
- Stop aspiring for success or the destination and devote yourself forever to the process or the journey.
- Make your luck yourself through the quality of your work & effort and do not feel devastated due to any isolated relationship fallout.
- Give your best to clear relationship misjudgments to bring valuable people back into your life and build ideal relationships with them.
- Be wise enough while choosing people you bring into your life and say ‘no’ to the people who don’t deserve you.
- Do not try too hard to be “strong”, “responsible”, or “successful”. Just be rational, do what your heart tells you to do in life, and do it without any guilt whatsoever.
- Develop your spiritual side through Yoga, Meditation, or getting close to nature whenever you can.
- Balance the ‘urge to expand’ by mixing it with the ‘need to stabilize’.
- Along with your mundane goals, set and try achieving some spiritual goals as well, for example, happiness, freedom, inner peace, etc.
Some Extra Tips To Keep Male Loneliness At Bay
- Open up to people, talk to them, make new friends, go out with them on traveling expeditions, and have some fun.
- Bring about the work-life balance and work to express who you are and not run away from it.
- Develop fulfillment within yourself first, instead of straightaway looking for someone else to impart meaning to your life.
- Be flexible and open to change, improvement, and transformation so that you don’t have to let people go or make their sacrifices.
- Give higher priority to personal goals than professional objectives and utilize the former as your launchpad in life.
- Give people reasons to stay with you instead of giving them the grounds to leave you lonely. Be an asset to them!
- Make people, relationships, and bonds, your biggest strength, and not your sublunary success.
- Be a naturally happy man so that you automatically attract people with your vibrant smiles, laughter, and blissful life.
This is how an unpopular man can turn his loneliness into fulfillment and thus, clear his life or habits of any signs of a lonely man.
Signs of A Lonely Man: The Conclusion
Male loneliness is a peculiar case. Many factors cause it including the man himself, his situation, society, and Nature. There are various signs of a lonely man which include silence, inability to enjoy life, workaholism, rigidity, and successful outings being his greatest pleasure. A man needs to check for these signs in him and if he finds them, he needs to remove them.
Although all the causes and signs do not relate only to the man, the key to solving the problem of male loneliness stays in the man’s hands only. To do this, he doesn’t need to transform his basic nature. All he needs to do is to make subtle tweaks in his thinking, attitude, and behaviour. What he needs to do is to bring more balance to his life, give more priority to personal milestones than to temporal success, and treasure the key people in his life. Doing this would turn his loneliness into fulfillment and once again make his life worth living by imparting more meaning, expression, and exuberance to it.